


Fall In Love

by Niina_rox



Category: Pentagon (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, a little fluff, friends - Freeform, it is what it is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-16 18:27:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29580231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Niina_rox/pseuds/Niina_rox
Summary: I hope this is decent.
Relationships: Yan An/Yeo Changgu | Yeo One
Kudos: 5





	Fall In Love

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in two hours xD  
> I hope everyone enjoys reading this.

Yan An wished he hadn’t fallen in love with his best friend, but it’s not that he didn’t want to love him more. It’s due to the fact that he’s not always included in Changgu’s plans, that he’s not always the one to make him smile. It’s also due to the fact that he hardly sees him, and they live together. It was a quiet night a few days after his birthday, when it started. Yan An had been in bed sleeping, when he woke up in a coughing fit. He slowly stumbles to the bathroom, and proceeds to throw up petals. Naturally, he’s confused. He spends a few moments looking into the toilet, letting the shock wear off.

Before getting rid of them.

He looks in the mirror and, notices there’s a bit of blood on his mouth. He quickly wipes it away, a few minutes later he heads back to bed. That’s when Changgu comes home, and stumbles to his room. The next morning Yan An is woken up by his phone, he blindly reaches for it. He doesn’t even look at who it is, “hello” _“Yan An are you still wanting to go out.”_ He rubs his eyes and, thinks about it “of course, I do.” Jin-ho smiled _“alright I’ll be by soon,”_ a couple of minutes later he hangs up. Yan An takes a moment before sitting up, he can already tell that Changgu isn’t home. He does his best not to think about it.

He showers and, gets dressed.

Then Jin-ho arrives, he grabs what he needs and, heads out. As soon as he’s in the car he looks at him, “are you okay” Yan An takes a moment. “Yeah” of course, Jin-ho doesn’t quite believe him, but he chooses not to interrogate him. They begin talking about other things, as they start their journey. When they arrive in the next town, Jin-ho casually asks; “have you seen much of Changgu.” Yan An feels his heart ache, he can’t hide his reaction from his friend. He lets out a quiet “no,” they slowly wander down the main street. “How come” he isn’t sure at all, “I wish I knew.” They stop at a café.

That’s when the feeling hits, Yan An is quick to run to the bathroom. Once again a handful of petals float on the water, he’s a little startled when he hears Jin-ho. “Oh my god” Yan An wipes away the tears that escaped, “please don’t say anything.” It falls quiet for a little while, Jin-ho flushes the evidence and, helps him up. Without hesitation he wraps him in his arms, that’s when he breaks. Yan An can’t seem to hold it together, once he’s stopped crying they head outside. They find a quiet spot to talk, “when did this start” “last night.” Jin-ho asks the obvious question, “is it Changgu” all he does is nod. “You should tell him,” “I already know that won’t happen.”

Jin-ho does his best to distract him, but it doesn’t work too well. In the end, they head home and, he takes him to see his doctor. Who confirms that he has Hanahaki, he’s given medication which should help. When Yan An gets home, he doesn’t know how to feel. He decides to look in Changgu’s room, he’s more than a little surprised to find some of his things are gone. That breaks his heart, he collapses on the bed. After another look around the room, he pulls out his phone. And types, and re-types a few messages.

_Yan An;_

_“When are you coming home.”_

_Changgu;_

_“I’m not.”_

_“I’m moving out.”_

His world shatters, so does his heart. He can’t help but, cry. He can’t even bring himself to ask why, he just moves to his room and, collapses on his bed. Wanting someone to comfort him and, tell him everything will be okay. After falling asleep for a few hours, he hoped that none of this was real. He walked out of his room, he noticed that more stuff was gone, and there was a note. Explaining that Changgu was moving in with, one of their other friends. There’s a part of him that doesn’t even want to tell him anything, he doesn’t even want to let his friends know. That night he lays on the couch, and endures a sleepless night.

The next morning.

He’s still sitting on the couch when Hyunggu walks in, it’s obvious he’s not doing well. Yan An looks at him “do you know where Changgu is,” the question hangs in the air for a few minutes. Hyunggu walks over to him, he’s confused “I thought he told you.” He noticed the note “I was hoping he’d explain it,” Yan An just wants to know. Hyunggu sits next to him “he’s living with Yuto now,” he simply nods “why” it falls quiet. It’s then he asks; “when did you last talk to him, as in, in person,” Yan An had to think about it. “Probably a week ago” Hyunggu feels bad for him, “he’s not a very good friend.”

He doesn’t disagree.

“I didn’t know he was moving until, I asked him yesterday if he was coming home.” Hyunggu wraps his arm around him, then he moves onto the reason he dropped by. “Jin-ho told me what you’re going through,” he’s not surprised “I really wish I didn’t love him.” Nothing more is said for a few minutes, that’s when Yan An has to throw up again. This time the petals are different, but no less significant. Once he comes back out, Hyunggu asks him “are you going to tell him.” He simply shakes his head “I was going to, but now he’s moved out. It’s even harder to talk to him” as Yan An gets comfortable on the couch, he falls asleep.

But he manages to hear Hyunggu say; “I’ll check on you later,” he quietly leaves and, decides to talk to Changgu. A few blocks away he arrives and, as soon as he walks in it’s clear it’s not good. “I’m curious about something Changgu,” he looks at him “and what would that be.” Hyunggu sits at the table opposite him, “had you planned on actually telling Yan An you had moved to his face. Or what” it falls quiet then Yuto appears, “you hadn’t told him” Changgu feels stupid. “Not exactly” it’s obvious that he messed up, Hyunggu adds; “it’s least you could do. When you have barely seen him lately,” Changgu looks at him.

“You talked to him” he _could_ tell him, but he won’t “yes, I just came from his place.” Yuto feels curious “is there a reason you’re avoiding him,” Changgu doesn’t have a reason. “No,” part of him wants to hide away, but he knows that won’t solve the problem. Hyunggu decides to leave, since he knows he’ll say something he’ll regret.

<3 <3 <3 <3

Two weeks have passed and, Yan An is slowly getting worse. He still hasn’t seen Changgu, which definitely adds to his situation. At work he makes a couple of new friends, Shinwon and Wooseok. They’re able to help him feel better, at least for a little while. The downside though, is that Yan An wishes he had what they have, with the loving looks they give each other. The way that they hold each other, and the way that they tease each other. It’s no surprise that they ask him, if he’s okay. Yan An takes a moment to think. Should he tell a couple of strangers? Explain to them why he feels this way.

“I’m fine” Shinwon pauses for a moment, “I can tell that you’re not” he begins to feel at ease. But as he’s about to tell them, he feels the urge to vomit. This time it’s more than just a few petals and, a little bit of blood. When he walks out of the bathroom, he’s a little dizzy as he makes his way to his locker. Yan An grabs his medication and, hopes that it will help. He misses the looks on their faces, he’s not expecting the comfort. All that he says is; “I hate being in love with my best friend,” they don’t ask for more. A few minutes pass then Wooseok says; “if you need another place to go, you can always come to ours.”

That would be a good idea.

“I like the sound of that” Shinwon laughs a little, in the end, the rest of the day passes by in a blur. Yan An slowly heads home, knowing there’s no one waiting for him. He grabs the mail before walking inside, it’s so eerily quiet but, it’s something he’s gotten used to. He wishes he didn’t feel so hopeless.

_Yan An;_

_“Are you ever going to talk to me?”_

A few tears hit the screen, he’s not surprised to get no reply. In the heat of the moment he sends, a simple message.

_Yan An;_

_“I hate you.”_

That only helps him a little, and it does make him feel worse. He cries himself to sleep.

<3 <3 <3 <3

Another week passes and, Yan An decides he needs a new best friend. He ends up in hospital, thanks to his condition becoming worse. Jin-ho and Hyunggu were the ones who found him, he had a few handfuls of petals beside him. As he lays in the hospital bed, it’s easy to see that he’s sick. That he’s lost some weight and, that he hasn’t been sleeping all that much. When Yan An wakes up he sees his friends, “thank god you’re alright. You had us worried” it falls quiet for a moment, “I’m sorry” a few minutes later, his doctor drops by. Pretty much telling him what he already knows, he barely has a reaction.

Not long after that Shinwon and Wooseok drop by, although he’s happy to have friends with him. He can’t help but, feel a little left out. It’s that afternoon when he hears, “you are going in there Changgu.” Of course, he’s about to protest “I don’t want to hear it, it’s been a month get your ass in there.” He opens his eyes to see his friend, neither of them have anything to say. Yan An feels relieved because he can finally talk to him, but he’s not sure what to say. Changgu sits in the seat beside him, not that it helps when he can’t look at him. It takes more than ten minutes, before he manages “I’m sorry for ignoring you.”

There are many things Yan An could add to that, he chooses “I still hate you.” _But I love you so much_. “That’s fair” he stops fiddling with his shirt, he slowly looks at him. Changgu can see that Yan An, is struggling to breathe. He can see that he’s thinner than before, he soon finds himself asking. “Why are you sick” Yan An’s simple answer, “I have Hanahaki,” it’s obvious he’s not expecting that. Changgu can’t stop the “why,” the vibe in the room changes. Yan An already knows his answer won’t change anything, it won’t solve a thing. He is tempted to not tell him anything, but instead of simply saying, ‘I love you.’

He says; “you ignored me for a month, you’ve barely said a word to me. I don’t have to tell you anything,” Changgu understands “I get it.” That’s when Yan An rolls away from him, he waits until he’s alone then he cries. _I’m so stupid._ The next day he finds Jin-ho sitting beside him, he smiles a little “hey” Yan An says; “hi.” “Did you tell him” “no,” he stares at the ceiling “I won’t ask why.” Yan An takes a deep breath, “I had the chance to tell him everything. Instead I simply told him I still hate him, and that I don’t have to explain why I’m sick.” Jin-ho holds his hand, “I’m sure you’ll have another opportunity.”

He gets released an hour later, when he gets home. He’s only a little surprised to see Changgu, it’s awkward as they sit next to each other on the couch. It helps that Jin-ho is there, he sits opposite them. “I know that Yan An doesn’t want to explain why he’s sick, but I feel that you deserve to know.” Changgu looks at him feeling slightly confused, “he’s in love with you” he looks at Yan An. “Wait, what?” now it’s Jin-ho’s turn to be confused, “why do you think he said he hates you. And chose not to tell you anything,” then “is this why Hyunggu got annoyed at me. When I didn’t explain that I moved,” “pretty much.”

All Changgu adds after that is; “I’m not a very good friend,” they don’t add anything to that. It’s quite obvious that nothing will happen, Yan An ends up heading to bed, since he needs to catch up on sleep. They choose to sit outside to talk, “I don’t want to make things worse. But I don’t know how I feel about him,” Jin-ho remains quiet for a moment. “I can’t even explain why I was avoiding him,” he still has no clue “I think the best option right now is. To simply see him more often, even if you don’t love him like that. At least be there for him,” Changgu agrees he leaves a few minutes later. Jin-ho stays for a little while longer.

A few days pass and, his condition improves a little. Yan An is just happy he doesn’t have to throw up as much, he’s also managing to keep food down. An upside to all of this, he’s seen more of Changgu. That helps more than he thought it would, it takes another day and, he ends up throwing up so much. And it’s Changgu who finds him lying on his bedroom floor, he tries to wake him up. It takes him close to ten minutes before, Yan An wakes up. He’s a little dazed, he slowly sits up. Yan An leans against his bed, “are you okay.” There’s no clear way to answer that, he loves the fact that Changgu is gently caressing his face.

He smiles a little “I-I think so” he struggles a little, Yan An closes his eyes and, just focuses on breathing. That helps Changgu with what he has to say, he ends up holding his hand. “I’ve thought about why I was avoiding you, and why I’ve been such a dumbass.” Yan An snorts, it helps break the tension. “I never fully realized how I felt about you,” he begins to crack “it’s been these past few days that. I’ve noticed how much I love you,” Yan An looks at him “seriously.” It doesn’t take much to know that Changgu is serious, “yes, it might have also been because our friends kept annoying me.” He holds his hand.

Then Changgu decides to go for it, he leans in for a quick kiss. It’s wonderful but, it’s not enough for Yan An. Who doesn’t let him pull away, after a few minutes he quickly heads to the bathroom. Where he not only throws up petals, but also a stems it hurts but, it helps. Changgu goes with him to the doctor, he's told that he's healed but, will throw up petals now and then. 


End file.
